Picture this: Two people walk into the same crisis. The project is behind schedule, the client is furious, and the team is falling apart.
The first person immediately starts assigning blame, calls an emergency meeting to “get to the bottom of this,” and sends a tersely worded email about “accountability and expectations.” The second person takes a breath, gathers the team, and says, “This is tough, but we’re in it together. Let’s figure out how to make this right.”
Same crisis. Same pressure. Completely different responses.
It’s a pattern at so many organizations: when the heat is on, people either retreat into management mode or step up into leadership. The difference isn’t about job titles or org charts—it’s about fundamental choices in how we treat people when it matters most.
Simon has spent years studying what separates managers from leaders, and the distinctions are both subtle and profound. Here are five critical differences that reveal whether you’re managing or leading.
1. Managers Hoard Information. Leaders Overshare.
We’ve all worked for that manager who treats information like classified intelligence. They keep key details close to the vest, thinking it gives them power or control. It’s like they’re running a secret club, and you’re not on the guest list.
Simon puts it this way: “A classic manager move: keep key details close to the vest, thinking it gives them power or control… Leaders? They go the opposite way. They’ll walk into a meeting and say, ‘Here’s everything I know, here’s what I don’t, and here’s what keeps me up at night.’ Why? Because trust is built on transparency, not secrecy.”
The contrast is striking. A manager might send out a vague email about a “change in direction” but won’t explain why. A leader calls the team together, lays out the business challenge, and says, “I want your ideas. Here’s what’s at stake.”
Simon’s advice? “Next time you’re tempted to hold back info, ask yourself, ‘What’s the worst that happens if I share this? What’s the best?'”
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