Photograph: Dame
There are three kinds of lubes on the market: Water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based. To make the right choice for your sex life, your lifestyle, and even your sex toys, it’s paramount to have an understanding of each.
Water-based lubes are by far the most common because of their compatibility with silicone toys and latex condoms. These lubes also tend to be the most affordable—they’re water-based, after all—so you’re going to find them both online and in sex shops easily. High-quality water-based lubes may as well be called aloe-based lubes because Aloe barbadensis leaf gel is the primary thickener in almost all of them. This substance provides a high degree of slickness without leaving behind a sticky residue. (Sometimes a mushroom extract is also used to help achieve a silky-smooth texture.) However, not all water-based lubes are made equal, and some might feel sticky. That's because they have a bad habit of getting absorbed by the skin quickly, so they need to be reapplied more frequently than other lubes. In other words, finding your favorite water-based lube requires a bit of trial and error. That’s also why, when I can, I do the finger rub test first when dealing with water-based lubes. If the lube gets sticky, tacky, or, even worse, pilly or chunky after a few minutes, I know it’s not going to be best fit.
Silicone lubes, on the other hand, are oil-based and they provide a much higher degree of friction reduction and last longer because they're not as readily absorbed by the skin. Because they are oil-based, you have to be careful not to stain your sheets or clothes when using them. Additionally, silicone lubes can degrade silicone toys over time, so it's best to keep most of your toys away from silicone lube (though glass and stainless steel toys and silicone lube get along great).
Natural oil-based lubes are becoming more common, and they typically use plant oils like coconut oil or avocado oil to provide lubrication. The upside of these is that they play nicely with silicone toys and won't degrade them like silicone-based lubes will, and because they're made from natural oils, they usually smell pretty good and are super hydrating. The downside is that they're a little more finicky and don't provide as much lubrication as silicone-based lubes. Oil-based lubes also can’t be used with latex condoms and can leave behind one heck of a stain on your sheets.