GoKawiilIncels—men who identify as involuntarily celibate—have long dominated conversations about loneliness and sex, both within the manosphere and on the broader internet.
But the data shows that young women, too, are having less sex. According to the National Survey of Family Growth, sexlessness among young adult women between the ages of 22 and 34 rose by roughly 50 percent from 2013 to 2023. The share of young women who hadn’t had sex in the past year climbed from 8 percent to 13 percent during that decade.
Their reasons for abstaining range from anxiety about the state of the world—the overturning of Roe v. Wade, the current political and economic climate—to a desire for total autonomy. While both genders experience similar rates of loneliness, studies have shown that single women tend to be happier than single men, possibly due to not having to deal with a disproportionate amount of household labor or deprioritize their sexual pleasure.
Online, the vocabulary is coalescing: femcel, boysober, opting out.
WIRED spoke to a trio of people who are very online about their celibacy—a career porn star taking a break from men, an asexual ex-Mormon YouTuber, and an entrepreneur who is saving herself for marriage—and are helping normalize it for the masses.
The Porn Star