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Key Takeaways Challenge your bias when it comes to confidence.
Share the spotlight with your team members.
Create a culture of recognition.
“You should watch your tone and how overconfident you are becoming,” my former boss warned me. This was our performance review conversation, where he started off by asking me how I thought the year went. I had been excited to share my accomplishments, including exceeding the metrics for all three of my goals.
“Is that what they taught you at that women’s conference you went to earlier this year? To show up as sharp and smug?” He said sarcastically. He then shook his head and chuckled, and got distracted by a ping on his laptop.
I felt like I had just been punched in the stomach. My former boss had been the one to tell me I was quiet and not visible enough at work. He said I had to be more confident. And then when I followed his coaching, I was being punished for it. In fact, this time, my performance review feedback now included that I should “balance that high level of confidence with some humility.”
My experience of trying to bolster my confidence to gain career visibility is not unique. In fact, I have been in many talent reviews and succession planning meetings, where too often, we question a woman’s lack of confidence. She needs to speak up more. She needs to advocate for herself. She needs to own her accomplishments and tell leadership about the impact she’s making.
According to new data from Workleap, 78% of women say they’re actually pretty comfortable promoting their professional achievements. Some women don’t need more tips on how to be more confident — they already are. They need to be working in more environments where they aren’t being penalized for being confident. And they need to be growing in environments where the burden isn’t on them to constantly be self-advocating.
As leaders, let’s create a culture where we don’t focus on the confidence gap. Let’s focus on how we can create a culture of recognition where we all feel recognized and rewarded for our work.
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