Steve Jobs and Bill Atkinson with the first Apple Macintosh – 1984
The Double Life of Bill Atkinson
Bill Atkinson, the visionary Apple engineer behind much of the original Macintosh, passed away on June 5, 2025, at age 74, from pancreatic cancer—the same illness that claimed his friend Steve Jobs. Obituaries across the tech world honoured his pioneering role in personal computing. At Apple, he developed QuickDraw, the graphics engine behind the Mac’s interface; invented MacPaint, the first widely adopted digital drawing tool; and created HyperCard, the groundbreaking software that anticipated the interactive, hyperlinked structure of today’s web.
Yet within OneLight, a private psychedelic community, a different legacy quietly unfolded. Members of OneLight knew Bill Atkinson by his pseudonym, “Grace Within.” He was a joyful, generous presence who spent his final years refining and openly sharing the technology behind the LightWand, a vape pen for administering the psychedelic Jaguar (5-MeO-DMT).
“Of all the things I’ve accomplished, nothing surpasses the need to carefully and thoroughly share Jaguar with the world.” — Bill Atkinson
Bill’s dual life as Grace Within remained hidden among a tight-knit circle. Now, honouring his final instructions, we at The Pattern Project can now share how he helped unlock and inspire the next generation of psychedelic innovation.
From left to right: Bill radiating his usual joy under the influence of Jaguar. With his iphone prototype. On the road in the last weeks of his life.
The Jaguar: 5-MeO-DMT
Jaguar—the underground term for the powerful psychedelic 5-MeO-DMT—is best known for rapidly dissolving the ego and delivering an overwhelming sense of unity, awe, or transcendence. Before the advent of the LightWand vape pen, smoking large consciousness-expanding doses was the norm. In these brief but intense sessions, some described sudden encounters with the sacred, moments of unexpected relief from childhood wounds, or a depth of awareness comparable to advanced meditation—all unfolding within just a few powerful minutes.
But these high-dose experiences also carry real risks: too much, without proper support, or use by those with specific health conditions can lead to psychological distress or lasting trauma. Still, more than 10 active or completed clinical trials are exploring 5-MeO-DMT’s therapeutic potential for treating addiction, depression, and other conditions.
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